Live Without Regrets

**The name has been changed to protect the innocent. ;)

I have this friend, who is quite possibly one of my favorite people, and she definitely understands me on levels that make life easier when we talk. I talk to her about some of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had, and share with her my most exciting moments. Ever since we met at work five years ago, I have called her mom, and I can tell her anything. Lately, we’ve become a lot closer and she’s the woman who is inspiring this post. 

This woman is almost 60 years old and has a passion for life that is so fun to be a part of. She has been married twice. Divorced once and widowed the second time after over 30 years of marriage. She is a pillar of strength. She stands in her truth. She loves completely and is constantly taking care of everyone else. She has this incredible infectious laugh. She has many people in her life that love and adore her, and I’m willing to guess the number of admirers is far greater than she knows.

She has never had that infamous list that people tend to have of all the things they’d like to do some day. She’s always lived for everyone else. Something is different now, and for the first time in her life, she is living completely for herself. She finally has started creating and acting upon that infamous list. Some of the things on the list may seem so silly, however, they are things that she has never experienced and she’s definitely marking things off. 

Last week we were out and she ordered her first shot ever. No, this isn’t her first alcoholic drink, but she had never had a shot. We laughed as she had this experience for the first time, and commemorated the moment with a picture.  She had never been on the back of a Harley, and a good friend of hers honored her request of marking this one off her list. She wants to get a tattoo in honor of her husband. She also wants to experience Wrigley Field, however that has to happen. I, personally, would love to see her go skydiving. Maybe even go on a crazy, fun international trip to some dream destination.  

So many people have asked where the old Anastasia went, as no one knows who she is right now. I stand by the fact that this Anastasia has always existed and she was more concerned with taking care of everyone else and never focused on the things she wanted. Regardless of how big or small those dreams were. She isn’t a different person because she wants to have some of these experiences. I believe she’s a more complete person. She’s operating more fully from her truth. She wants to live the next 30 years with no regrets and without holding back. 

My challenge for my friends is to start living your next 30 years now. There is no need to wait until you are 60 years old to start living for you. I believe that when we take care of ourselves and honor our dreams, regardless of what those are, we become more complete and can give ourselves more completely to those around us. Life is about discovering who you are and being that person, even in the absence of acceptance from those that you love.

I recently heard a man say, “There is nothing right that you can say to the wrong person, and there is nothing wrong you can say to the right person.” I think this is just living in general. There is no way that one can live authentically and damage their relationships (as long as it doesn’t harm or hurt someone else). As we become more aware of who we are and as we stand for that, those around us will come to love and appreciate us even more. Live in your truth.

I have spent many hours with Anastasia talking about life, crying, laughing, and sharing wisdom. (Yes, I may be a bit younger, but I do have some wisdom to impart.) We are 100% authentic with each other, and I appreciate the space provided to be who I am. She doesn’t judge me, she doesn’t wish me to be a different person, and she encourages all of my crazy ideas. What would have been different if she would have had that in her life?

So, what’s on your list? What have you always wanted to do and you haven’t found the courage to do it yet? What keeps you from living on the edge? Don’t wait. Start now. Find your passion and then go after it…make today the kind of good old days that you’ll be excited to share. Your grandkids will thank you for it.